Bini Dahal

Gender roles are so common, especially in the patriarchal society like ours. Both males and females are expected to perform different tasks assigned by the society. Males are considered to have the upper hand in decision making as they are the breadwinners of the family. Females are seen performing household chores, reproductive and productive tasks. This type of segregation deepens gender inequality in our society. Yet, very few are able to break free from gender roles and the inequality.

Society is made up of varied norms and values. One group of people truly complies with them. However, another group does not enjoy being within the societal barrier and it tries to break this. It is applicable in the case of gender roles as well. With a rising level of awareness and education among the population, the concept of gender equality has become clearer. In the past, males did not really support females in household chores. But lately, a small but growing percentage of male members are seen doing household chores along with their female counterparts.

In my neighbourhood, I have seen some males actively cooking, cleaning the surroundings with broomsticks, putting the laundry up for drying, washing dishes and planting different crops in the garden. And the fact that they also are working members in the family indicates the changing society and subsequent concept of gender roles.

Yet, breaking the traditional norms is not an easy process. However, there are still some people who keep staring at others in amazement when the latter are involved in common household chores. Also, they are asked where the female members of the family have gone. Why? This is purely because of the internalisation that women hold the true responsibility to perform all the household chores. Now, someone who doesn't like people giving him too much attention might feel really disturbed and dejected.

Instead of encouraging and appreciating them, our actions can utterly demotivate them as well. Children, especially sons, learn the same through gender socialisation, which is why we always look for such girls as daughter-in-law candidates who know how to cook food and perform household chores. This reduces the distress of the boy and the family and it continues over and over.

Just obtaining an education degree and acting as a highly intellectual cannot make any individual a change-maker. We have to let go of our traditional beliefs to become such persons. And supportive male members have done so by reducing the existing gap and inequality that persists between the two genders. Now is the time to change ourselves. The next time, those people who look super shocked and surprised of family supporting males should follow suit. And female members should stop feeling jealous of not receiving the same level of support.

They should go back home and encourage their male family members to be more active and contributing in household chores. We should be highly supportive of one another. Reversal of gender roles between males and females should not be considered a unique process, rather should be taken as something obvious and needed for our society. Lastly, we have got to remember that no job is gender-specific. It is just our thinking that has got excessively gendered!