Bini Dahal

Being a social animal, we, humans, cannot live without society. From our birth to death, we integrate, follow societal rules, adapt to them and live accordingly. But when certain dos and don’ts created by society are broken, it may turn hellish for us.
On the night of November 11, a 17-year-old girl, Amrita Kumari Sah, was shot dead while sleeping in Madhavnarayan Municipality-7 of Rautahat district. The astounding fact was that the murder was planned by Amrita's parents. The reason being Amrita had been in a relationship with Sosindra Paswan, a 30 years old man for the past three years. According to media reports, the Sah family was against their daughter's relationship with that man and had married her off to another person, Rupesh Sah.
The whole issue escalated when Amrita mobilised her boyfriend and others to attack her husband with a knife and tried to kill him. The attack resulted in divorce between the couple. Then, Amrita's ex-husband and his family filed a case of attempted murder against her and her boyfriend.
After the divorce, the girl’s family was highly concerned that Amrita would elope with her lover and the dishonour it would bring to the family. So, to protect their so-called 'social prestige', they hired a henchman. They had planned to send her to Bihar on the pretext of medical treatment and murder her there. But she had been able to escape before the plan could be executed.
Then, the second plan was devised. As much as Rs. 100,000 was given to four criminal-minded people who performed the task while she was sleeping, with her mother in the bathroom. The police now have arrested the four men as well as the honour seeking parents.
Although our societal beliefs are changing slowly, we still see instances of people not welcoming any kind of change. The relationship between a man and a woman is still made highly controversial. And every action of family members is linked with the family’s honour in the society. The most prominent family members who are targeted are girls and women.
As we observe the 16-day Activism Against Gender-based Violence (from November 25 to December 10), we cannot ignore the fact that violence-related cases are on the rise globally. In the context of Nepal, there still lacks any law concerning honour killing. But looking at the current situation and even trend among certain people to protect their honour, it is high time the government immediately formulated and implemented strict laws to put a control on such acts. If we consider ourselves and our society to be civilised, we must not be a part of it.
Even though Nepal is a developing country with widespread poverty, these days, I feel, it is the mental poverty that has created bigger problem. We are so careful about our society that we try to seek validation from it through our actions. If we get the courage to kill our own flesh and blood in the pursuit of honour, it is a reminder to all of us that our society is going on the wrong path. After all, killing a human being in the name of honour is the biggest dishonour ever!